Stephen 'spaceman' Hawkins.

Oh dear Lord. Stephen Hawkins, who as far as I know can move one fucking eyelid, had a taste of weightlessness as his 65th birthday present. Did you see this? I'm a wondering what they'll do - surely they won't let him go still strapped to his chair? But then if he's not in his chair won't he flail around and injure people (when you sit at home hiding from the World you think of these things). And then I see it on TV - the cruel fucks tied his arms behind his back and pushed him around like schoolyard bullies. Did he enjoy it? How the fuck would I know? He seemed to drool a lot, is that a good sign?

Back on the ground he was asked how it went. I've no idea what he said because I don't speak robot. Apparently he said 'next stop space'. Wouldn't you be bummed if you were an astronaut on that flight? Fifteen years of training, this is your big moment, your finally going - and there you are on TV pushing a chairbound noddy up the ramp.

I suppose NASA will have to spend a $billion putting a disabled park onto the Space Station.

A doctor I know remarked the other day that Hawkins seems to breathe on his own and that if he truly had complete muscle wastage he should be on a ventilator. I asked him if he was saying that the Prof. was a fraud and he looked at me and smiled knowingly. Could it be true that Hawkins knows that everything he says is non-sensical so he pretends to be desperatley ill so no-one picks him up on it? 'Hawkins yer books are full of shit!' 'Boooo, don't be nasty to him he's in a chair...'

'We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special.'
Stephen Hawking

Speak for yourself.